Everything Must Go.

The world is huge.

Literally... like, it's ridiculously large. 
And with that vast amount of space comes an insane number of inhabitants. 
It's so easy to feel like you're just a speck on a canvas called life...mostly because, well...you are.
But that doesn't stop me from feeling like the brilliant, vibrant speck that I am. If there's nothing else I've picked up and carried with me through my life so far, it's the fact that we only get one shot here. And depending on your particular beliefs, you may feel that you'll continue after this life (as I do), but you're never going to get another chance to be who you are in this particular time and place. 
So why not make the most of it?
Yes, life has it's issues. We've got bills, and debts, and dependents, and ailments, and work stress, and family stress, and relationship stress, and everything else imaginable. 
But these things are only temporary. 
I refuse to let them hinder the way I float through life. Things that are tangible serve precise purposes during our stay on this earth...but the intangibles?? That's what I'm here for. 
I'm here for the love that surrounds me... it's more powerful and consuming than any hate, negativity, and animosity could ever be. 
I'm here for the music...because there is indeed a song for EVERY occasion.
I'm here for the laughter...because I'm a dork and I truly believe that laughter is good for the soul.
I'm here for all the things that we can't take with us.
Because ultimately,
Everything must go. 

"I'll Get to Wherever You Are..."

I went to the movies with Dorkface last month and saw The Best Man Holiday (which I loved, of course) but I was even more in love with the soundtrack!
More specifically, I fell in absolute LOVE with the song "Shelter" by John Legend.

It's such a beautiful song, and it makes me think about the concept of soul mates... I'm still questioning my belief in them. Whether or not they exist. If so, are we only allotted one in a lifetime? 
If you find your soulmate, and then lose them, is it always destined that you'll find your way back to them? 
Is a soulmate always romantic? 
Can a platonic friend be a soulmate?
I have so many questions...
Whatever the answers hold, I do know that this song is something like what I think soulmates signify. Some people are simply drawn together over lifetimes, and there has to be some explanation. Right?

"Look over your shoulder....I'm never too far....I'll get to wherever you are."

12:36 AM

"I do not feel the fear of falling...
I wanna fly.
If it all goes well, then I will...
...but what if I don't?"

Shuffle Post 11/25

I've been pretty sick today but my first song in this evening's shuffle is "Words" by Anthony David & India.Arie...

I love this song, its lyrics are just super real, the piano accompaniment is beautiful, and I think the two artists complement each other pretty well. 

It's hard to even pick a favorite part of the song, but there's one part that's always kinda jumped out at me:

"Got my mind made

I don't plan to leave...

'cause you are meant for me.

Simple, that may be...

Why be complex?

Loving you is so easy..."

The last couple lines hit home, I feel like sometimes we make love so complicated and...extra. And it really doesn't have to be. We impose so many rules and expectations on something that, in its purest form, should really be easy. We make it complicated because we don't allow love to develop and flourish on its own. We want it to fit a template that others have laid out, when really love isn't some one-size-fits-all type of deal. Sometimes it's unorthodox. Sometimes it's beyond explanation. And, well...Sometimes you just gotta let it be.

Shuffle Post 11/24

So I have this thing. It's grown into somewhat of a compulsion actually lol. But every time I wake up, I have to start a new shuffle on my phone's music library. I almost feel like something bad might happen if I don't. I do this every time I get into my car, as well. It's weird. But whatever. 
Anyway, the thing is...I love to really listen to the first song that plays in the shuffle. I feel like that song has some kind of meaning for coming up first on that particular day. 

Today my first song is "Woman Like Me" by the Creole Queen herself (Mrs. Carter if ya nasty). Now I loves me some Bey. This songs has been a fave of mine for awhile, because it's reminiscent of how I feel when I start feeling a guy lol. I'll just post my fave verse.

"Do you think

You could fall for a Woman Like Me...?

'Cause I find it hard to trust

And I need too much

And I really don't believe in love, no no...

Do you think

That I could be the girl of your dreams?

Sometimes I don't let things go,

I get emotional...

And sometimes I'm just out of CONTROL..."

Far Away....

"Tear stains on my pillow, 
Trying to forget YOU,
Don't know what I'm gonna do....
Four days and countin', 
I've been laying here staring myself in the mirror all alone in my room.
I can't feel this way again...
Gotta think with my head,
'Cause my heart is what got me here..."


"I was by your side when we were meant to be; I guess it doesn't matter now that you're so Far Away..."
--Ms. Marsha Ambrosius. ♥

This Song...

is EVERYTHING to me right now.... I love every note & lyric of it.

Heavy Rotation ♥

I'm pretty sure I eat, sleep, and breathe music... mostly Raheem Devaughn lol...
But anywho, there are certain songs that I can't go a day without listening to, so I thought I'd share some with you guys from time to time! All week, I've re-discovered my auditory love affair with the song Mr. Incredible, Ms. Unforgettable by Leela James (featuring Raheem Devaughn).... yes, the combination is as amazing as you think. I adore them both, so clearly this song is like an eargasm for me. The first verse (lyrics below) is too sweet for words... Here's a YT link if you've never heard the song! (it's not an actual music video, but you can hear the song). Enjoy.♥

(Raheem) If I could write a letter to your heart,

I'd start by saying that we'll never part, 

And please...say that you'll be mine

Until the end of time.

(Leela) If I were a lock, I'd let you be the key

To unlock all of this love in me,

To unlock all of this ecstasy,

And if you think that I'm worried...

Let your mind be rest assured.

♥

Day 9--Letter to Someone I Wish I Could Meet. ♥

Disclaimer: If you've ever read my blog, you should already KNOW who this letter is gonna be addressed to! Lol! 
To the Musical Love of My Life,
Once again, every word in this letter's gonna be about You...I love you!! Of course I've already written one letter to you in this blog challenge, and I don't know if it's against the "rules" to write to the same person twice or more, but oh well... There's no one else alive that I'd rather meet! Yes, I know there's Barack Obama and such, but I'll keep it real... I'd still rather meet you! I'd be Lying to Myself if I said anything different! Lol. I wish people could understand how much I adore you! Not even on an attraction level (don't get me wrong, you're mad cute!!) but just musically... No one has my attention the way you do! I could tell you how I feel about you Night and Day! They don't feel me, though! Lol.
I was so sad that I couldn't go to your concert earlier this month, but one day... one day! Until then, I'll stick to the musical orgasm I have every day of my life (no, literally) when I hear your voice in my headphones, on my laptop, or in my car. Words can't express how amazing I think you are, in the least groupie-ish way possible! Lol. If I met you and you sang to me, I'd probably faint and fall on my ass like Ashley in that one episode of Fresh Prince of Bel-Air when Tevin Campbell came to her party lmao! That would seriously be thee best thing ever, though! Anywho, I'm so happy you're getting all the success you deserve, and I hope it continues! I'll profess my love for you 'til the end of my days! Yes, it's really that serious! Lmao!
Love Always, 
Your Number One (again) ♥
PS: For your listening enjoyment... I can't let an hour go by without listening to this song! If you aren't hip, you better get hip with thee quickness!

LyricsILove.♥

You've hurt so long...Reward comes to those who've cried.

Real. Love. Purified

--SWV "Use Your Heart" ♥

Believe♥

"I ain't like them others you done dealt with in your past....

Just have some faith,

That's all I ask...

Believe in Me."

--Raheem DeVaughn. 'Believe'. The Love Experience. ♥

Oh Yeah...♥

I'll be 22 in 29 days... suggestions for birthday celebration? I don't even have any idea what I want to do. I'm pretty boring. Lol. Well, I'd prefer the term mellow...but whatev. Anyway, what I DO know is that the love of my musical life {who you should know by now} will be in Cleveland {my hometown} on August 5th. Granted he'll be a few days shy of my birthday, but I'll take it! I've never seen him in concert before {SMH} but I will be in attendance. Please believe it. 
Random side note: Have you ever listened to the live version of Jill Scott's "Gettin in the Way" from her Experience album? The commentary at the end of the song is hilarious.... lol. 
x0x0♥

Untitled. ♥

"Wife...you deserve the label, but you've been hurt before so you're sore and don't feel you're able..." --Wale {Diary} ♥

So anyone who knows me will tell you that I'm hopelessly addicted to this song...I just love it. By far my favorite Wale joint ever. Marsha Ambrosious killed it too. Anyway...I'm listening to this as I type, with the volume as high as it'll go...on repeat...and it's just got me thinking about so much stuff...not necessarily personal stuff. Just in general...How many of us know someone who's let past relationships negatively affect our present relationships {or potential relationships}? A lot, right? My heart hurts for that person who isn't willing to let love back into his/her life, all because they let it in before and someone left them damaged...experience has shown us that usually it's easier to break something than it is to repair it...why would the heart be any different? It's so bad that it's gotten to a point where younger generations are being raised by bitter, damaged single parents...and are being taught not to believe in love in the first place, all because of the possibility of being hurt...On one hand, I can understand a parent's desire to keep any and all types of harm away from their children...but how can we know what joy feels like if we've never been exposed to pain? 
I'm also thinking about how people have this cycle...and half the time, they don't even realize it. We choose partners who either possess traits that we are used to being exposed to, or the opposite. Whether positive or negative...sometimes we're too used to something to objectively decide it's bad for us. Other times, we realize what's unhealthy, and aim for the furthest thing from it...but when every person you enter a relationship treats you the same way, or every relationship has the same outcome...you're engaging in a cycle. I think about so many people I know who jump from one partner to the next, and in the end everything turns out all bad...reinforcing the assumption that all men/women "aint shit"...but if trial and error doesn't teach you to modify your standards...aren't you partially to blame? It just seems as though those of use who have been hurt have a tendency to prejudge every subsequent person who approaches us...and rejecting those people {because you think all men/women ain't shit} could very well lead them to believe that all men/women ain't shit as well...so they'll go on to treat their next partner like crap...virtually just one big presumptuous, prejudiced domino effect...and all because we don't want to hurt. It's easier to hurt others than to let ourselves succumb to being the victim. It's quite the phenomenon, actually...
It's not only something that affects our interpersonal relationships... it affects self-esteem, as well. Being hurt has a tendency to make people think they deserved what happened to them...or caused it. That they don't deserve better. I think this is the reason for the whole cycle...why else would one continuously put their self in the position to be hurt?
x0x0♥

What is It?? ♥

I was browsing another website when I saw a post about a book entitled Losing My Cool: How a Father’s Love and 15,000 Books Beat Hip-Hop Culture by Thomas Chatterton Williams. In his text, Williams looks at how Hip-Hop has basically become a pervasive detriment to our community; Hip-Hop Culture has replaced Black Culture.
I want to read this book, so when I do I’ll offer an actual opinion on it. Although the book is new to me, the argument isn’t. I’ve heard it countless times since I’ve been in college, around people who are actually willing to step back and take a look at the reality of what our “culture” has become, without being too defensive to see the real deal. That being said, I agree with some aspects of Mr. Williams’ argument. 
I don’t think Hip-Hop is to blame for what’s going on in households and street corners around the world. Period, point blank. I do, however, believe that somewhere along the line, the world’s image of a Black person became that “thugged-out”, sperm-donating, baggy-pants wearing, cornrow rockin’ jewelry-laced person that can be seen on TV at any given time in the day. This has become what people expect of us. I wrote a post back when the BET series Harlem Heights aired, and I mentioned that Black people don’t respond to shows that try to represent our race in a positive light. We’d rather see ourselves on TV acting a damn fool. I’m willing to bet that a lot of kids under 18 today have never even watched such things as The Cosby Show, A Different World, etc. It’s not fast-paced enough for many of these kids, who are being raised in the world of reality TV and 106th & Park. However, I don’t blame hip-hop.
It is my opinion, as a Black, 21 year old, hood-born-and-raised woman in America, that families are at the core of responsibility. Individuals and their choices. People have dropped the ball in generations as of late, and no one seems strong enough (or willing) to look in the mirror and acknowledge what is so apparent. Isn't acknowledging a problem the first step to fixing it? If we never take that step, what is the fate of our Black Community? Yes, there are things that have happened in this world to us as a people. But what about the things we continuously do to ourselves and to one another? What about darkskin vs. lightskin? What about “good hair” vs. “nappy hair”? What about “acting White” vs. “acting Black”? I doubt that Hip-Hop put those drugs into the hands of drug dealers and the fiends they’re accustomed to serving. Hip-Hop isn’t the culprit of a person beating his/her spouse, children, etc. I think it’s weak-minded of anyone to suggest that a genre of music has infiltrated his/her daily life to the point where it changes them for the worst. Where is our common sense???
A lot of us seem to have internalized the idea that to be Black is to be dumbed-down, inarticulate, hyper sexualized, etc…all while rocking the latest styles. It’s pretty ridiculous, right? Kids are afraid to show their intelligence because someone will accuse them of being an “Oreo” or “acting White”. So the smart kids sit in class, keeping answers to themselves, purposely inserting slang and ebonics into their everyday vernacular, just to satisfy someone else’s internalized ignorance. It hurts my soul…pushing past stereotypes is something we simply need to develop the strength to do.
I was born and raised in Cleveland, Ohio. The real Cleveland, not the surrounding areas where all the White people live/used to live before Black people moved in and “chased them away”. I live in the Cleveland where there’s literally an abandoned home next door, a crack house across the street, another couple crack houses down the street, an Arab-owned store on the corner, right next to a church, and a prostitute who’s walked our block for as long as I can remember, with her short cut blond hair and her missing front teeth. That’s where I’ve lived. I was raised, like so many others, by my mother and her mother, with my father heavily in the picture as well, just not living in the household. I grew up riding my bike around the block, buying candy from the corner store, and I grew up listening to Hip-Hop. However I am not a typical product of my environment. I don’t steal, I don’t do drugs, I don’t have any children/pregnancies/abortions, I’m a semester away from earning my first college degree, and I have every intention of earning at least one more. Every free moment I have is spent listening to music, especially Hip-Hop. So I ask you, is Hip-Hop really to blame?
To sum it all up (because I know some people love lists and bullet points and whatnot):
It is not Hip-Hop's job to:
1) Raise your children.
2) Be a role model for your children.
3) Teach your children how to excel.
4) Provide a blueprint to success.
At best, Hip-Hop is an art form, used to relay the emotions and thoughts of our people, in a way that uplifts our spirits while putting a creative spin on our reality.
At worst, Hip-Hop is just another form of cheap entertainment, a business designed to exploit our people by promising us the very thing that we've been trying to gain for decades on this continent: wealth. 
Either way, there is so much more out there for all of us. The problem is lack of encouragement and knowledge being instilled in our children, to let them know that they ARE more than the clothes they "rock" and the cell phones, iPods, and gadgets they own. The potential is limitless, but it means nothing without desire to do better...
x0x0♥

Manipulation... ♥

So I'm listening to Wale's "The Manipulation" {a track from The Mixtape About Nothing} and it made me wonder...why are there so many women who settle for men talking to them any ol' kind of way? If you've never heard the song, it's kind of an alter-ego set-up with two separate beats. Against one beat, Wale raps from the point of view of a sweet, considerate, well-mannered guy. Then the beat switches and you have the other guy who calls women b*tches and h*es, and basically demeans them. The moral is that women have a choice of which type of guy we respond to, and I completely agree. 
There's nothing I hate more than hearing a female talk about how disrespected they felt when a dude approached them with "Yo b*tch, you got a man?" or "Damn girl, you got a fat a*s...what I gotta do to hop on that?!"...then a week later, the two of them are dating. What makes certain women respond to these approaches? I've discussed this with female friends before, and one common thing was that back in, say, high school, it was the 'thing' to approach girls like this. So the girls thought guys who stepped to them this way were cool. I don't remember ever thinking that was cute...lol. Apparently at some point, girls let this become "cool", so more guys started doing it. 
When did disrespectful guys become the default, making well-mannered ones the exception? Would you notice the quiet, mellow, respectful guy first at a club/mall/party? Or would you notice the loud, obnoxious, rude one? Which would you prefer to approach/be approached by?
x0x0 ♥

Truth? ♥

I don't know what the hell I'm doing after undergrad.
I don't know where I want to reside after undergrad.
I ate ice cream and Dove chocolates for breakfast this morning.
Worms make my insides churn.
I'm scared of marriage...because I'm scared of divorce.
I voted for Obama because he's Black.
I'm not ashamed, either.
I have 3 closets FULL of clothes...and sometimes I still have nothing to wear.
There's a spider crawling across my ceiling right now. 
I won't kill it because I'm afraid that if I miss, it'll fall on my head.
Every free moment of my life is filled with music, either in my head or from my speakers.
I still think boys have cooties. 
I like my men strong and BLACK... 
My coffee is a different story...
That is all.
For now.
x0x0♥

Hola, Muchachos! ♥

Hey guys!
Sorry I've been away, but I'm back! Hopefully I'll be back on track with my blogging! 
It's Monday, and it's finals week. I'm wrapping up what has been my best semester in awhile! I'm seriously thinking I'll have my 4.0 this time. I've already aced 3 out of 5 finals (and their respective classes), and I have 2 papers I'm waiting on grades for (which I'm pretty sure are A's too) so I'm hoping for the best! 
In other news...while I was away, I became single! 
For like a day. Lol. A little miscommunication (actually more like a lack of communication) led to issues where my S.O. felt there was a lot of negative stuff going on that he couldn't talk to me about it...so he simply didn't talk to me. For a number of days. At the time I was going OFF...like WTF, really dude? I declared myself single (I made it FB official and EVERYTHING, but he doesn't even check his FB anymore so it was pretty pointless and went unnoticed lol) even though I knew in my heart that I was still 'In a Relationship' lol. But we worked it out, talked it out, and now we're all patched up. Sometimes we get too comfortable as a couple, and perhaps we forget about the friendship thing we once had where we could vent to each other about anything under the sun... and these things happen. *shrug*
Hmmm what else... I cut some ties I should have cut a LONG time ago. It feels good. I feel free. I don't need people in or around my life who are serving no purpose. I'm not crippled; I don't need anyone as a crutch. On the same token, I don't want to be anyone else's crutch, either. You know that little cliche about seasonal friends/acquaintances? Yeah... some people have been in my life long past their season. Expiration date was up a long time ago, and it's not that I just realized this...it's that I'm just now taking the initiative to actually do something about it. So I'm in a good place right now... I'm about to finish jammin' to this Wale {The Mixtape About Nothing} and eating my ice cream {yes, it's 11:30 at night but so what. I've had a long day lol}
x0x0♥

My New Absolute FAVE Quote... ♥

"They play it safe; are quick to assassinate what they do not understand. 

They move in packs, ingesting more and more fear with every act of hate on one another. 

They feel most comfortable in groups...less guilt to swallow. 

They are US. This is what we have become. Afraid to respect the individual...

A single person within a circumstance can move on to change...to love herself... to EvolvE." 

--Erykah Badu ♥

The Price of Fame...♥

I just had to post this link to Kanye's latest blog post... 
I promise, I've loved Kanye's music for so long, and consistently...I miss him! The College Dropout never left my earphones the since the day it was released. It went from the CD player, to the first mp3 player, to the iTunes and the iPod. That, lyrically, is one of my favorite albums. That's just my opinion. Say what you will about him, but the man has words for days....
These gossip sites give him a lot of BS, but when you really sit and read his words, Kanye is probably one of the people (mainstream celebrity-wise) with the most knowledge to offer. I don't think he's crazy, I think he's been through enough ish that he has to sit and just write sometimes. I know the feeling. His mom was his rock. It's funny how the website I saw this link on (which I won't name, because I don't deem them worthy of the shout out) is like soooo many other celeb-based blogs and forms of media. One minute, a person is everyone's favorite. They're on top, and their creative mind is getting this high that they've always dreamed of. The next minute, they're hated, being dissed and criticized by the same people who boosted them up onto the very pedestal they're being knocked off of. The mind and ego are, in my opinion, two of the most fragile components of human beings. Hollywood and the media have seen the birth and death (literally and figuratively) of so many celebrities who, in the end, just wanted to be heard, and accepted, and...well, loved. It's funny how media has the power to do so much good and so much evil. It's also funny how hard it would be for some to decide which is more entertaining: the positive, uplifting messages or those that beat down the very essence of one's being, just to restart and repeat the cycle all over again the next week. I don't think I could afford the price of fame... it costs too much.
x0x0

This...

is what I would want for Valentine's Day... lol if I weren't so desperately in love (insider) Lol. For now, I'll just stick to having his amazing music on repeat 24/7... literally lol. Happy Valentine's Day, lovers and loves! 
x0x0♥